This was only my second trip to the hallowed ground of The Church of Southern Wrestling. The crowd in Cornelia is a mixed crowd of families with kids, older people, and very few smarky fans. I counted about 130 in attendance, and they were loud, rowdy, and looking for a good time. The show ran about 4 hours, but it didn't feel that long. The highlight of the show was the ultraviolent match between Masada and Brad Cash, and the announcers sold it well during their opening remarks.
1)Kevin Blue vs. Billy Buck
Billy Buck is truly Cornelia's hero. The entire crowd was crazy for him except a couple of fans in the front who decided to cheer for heel Kevin Blue. Blue attempted to attack Buck during his entrance, but Buck thwarted him and continued basking in the attention of his adoring admirers. Blue was going to clock Buck with the belt, but Buck superkicked him. Blue hit Buck with a chair outside the ring, and the referee didn't see. Blue got Buck to tap out, winning him a spot in the final of the Why We Wrestle heavyweight title tournament. Officials had to help Buck out of the ring. This opener set the tone for a strong overall show.
2)Stryknyn vs. Geter
A "Stryk's gonna kill you chant" filled the arena. The two of them brawled, Stryk struggling against Geter's size. In the end, Stryknyn beat Geter with a spear, and he advanced to the final to face Kevin Blue. Geter, infuriated with his loss, pulverized Stryknyn after the match. Mikael Judas came out to make the save, and he and Geter brawled their way back to the locker room. Blue took advantage of Stryk's confusion and beat him up on the ramp as he walked back to the locker room. Officials had to help him to the back.
3)Timmy Lou Retton vs. Slim J.
Timmy Lou Retton did a cartwheel and a split during his entrance. Slim J mocked Retton with Karate Kid poses, and they did a tumble-off before locking up in earnest. Timmy Lou Retton won the match with a neckbreaker, but after witnessing the athleticism and charisma of Slim J, I wonder why he's not on television.
4) The Get-Along Gang (CB Suave, P Dogg, Marko Polo, Gil Quest) vs. The Ambassadors (Jacoby Boykins and Chris Mayne) and The Sound and The Fury (William Huckaby and Joe Black)
P-Dogg and his entourage are hilarious with their wanna-be rap posse gimmick. The two teams battled back and forth. Boykins struck Huckaby out of the way when he came to his aid, and Gil Quest took advantage of the dissension and rolled up Boykins. The Ambassadors and The Sound and The Fury wanted to kill each other. Commissioner Dany Only said they had to end it if they wanted to be in the tag team tournament. They could fulfill their dreams of Tag Team Gold in the future, or they could end that all by fighting tonight. They reluctantly stopped fighting to keep their spots in the tag team tournament.
5) "Off Kilter" Rob Killjoy vs. James Drake
Drake is a relative newcomer to Why We Wrestle. Killjoy has a better look and a better moveset, but Drake had the hearts of the crowd. Killjoy tried to introduce a chair into the match, but Billy Buck came out and grabbed the chair. Drake regained momentum in the match after the distraction and won the match with a cutter.
6) Iceberg vs. Shane Hexon
Iceberg chants permeated the crowd. The match went along well until a miscue where it appeared Iceberg was supposed to roll out of the way of Hexon's move, but didn't. It messed up the rythym of the match. Hexon won the match with a kick. Iceberg raised Hexon's hand in solidarity. Dany Only hugged Iceberg in the middle of the ring, and he called for a standing ovation.
7) "Deathwish" Brad Cash vs. Masada
Special ring announcer "White Trash" announced this ultraviolent match. Light tubes, a staple gun, barbed wire boards, kendo sticks and bamboo skewers were among the featured weapons in this bloody, over the top, extravaganza. Cash wasted no time as he applied a small handsaw to Masada's head. Masada stapled Cash's forehead. Cash pulled a staple out of his head, licking the blood. The crowd called for the barbed wire boards to be introduced into the match. Masada threw Cash through the barbed wire board eliciting a "This is Awesome" chant. Cash returned the favor. The crowd yelled for fire. Cash set a kendo stick ablaze and smacked Masada in the back. Masada opened a pack of skewers, and drove them into the bloody cuts on Cash's forehead. He DDT'd him face first onto those skewers. Shards of glass flew all the way back to the bleachers when they hit each other with the light tubes. Dee Byers tried to stop the match because he said it was too violent. The crowd was livid. White Trash hit Dee Byers in the head with a stop sign, and said "We finish these matches. This is what this building has always been. Ring the Bell." The match continued, spilling outside the building for a bit, then returning to ringside. Masada set the barbed wire board outside like a table, placed Cash onto it, and dived on him. Masada got the pin after suplexing Cash into the board in the corner of the ring. Barbed wire was all in Cash's back. Fans of ultraviolence got their money's worth from this contest.
JT Talent hosted his popular Talent Show segment. He joked about having the honor of following the deathmatch. He hosted Jeff. G. Bailey, who is now over as a face in Why We Wrestle. Talent asked him "Who is your favorite client?" He named off AJ Styles, Abyss, and R Truth as a few, but added there'd been so many. He was asked about his favorite tag teams, and of course included Talent and Money. Bailey announced that he was bringing in Gunner Miller, all star in both baseball and football at the University of Chattanooga. He's already auditioned for WWE in Florida, but he's been brought here by Bailey to get "seasoning". "He's got superstar written all over him. He's going to take on your favorites, and bring nothing but pain to them. This is Gunner Miller's ring." Bailey crowed, giving us the hardcore sell at Hardcore Hell. "The church of Southern Wrestling is the only place where real wrestling takes place. Accept no substitutes."
8) Anthony Henry vs. David Young
David Young wanted to beat Anthony Henry's ass for disrespecting his daughter, Amber. It was a last man standing match. Henry insulted Young by asking why he's decided to stand up for his daughter now. "Where were you when you were off being a big star in TNA? Where were you for her when you were off sleeping with ring rats?" He said to Amber, "I love you so much, that I'll let him get out of this if he comes out here. Come out here and tell her what a piece of trash you are." Henry busted Young open. Amber looked distressed at ringside. They fought into the crowd, Henry dived onto Young driving him into the chairs. The two fought back and forth. A fire extinguisher was introduced by Henry, but Amber took it from him. Young hit Henry in the confusion, and Amber stopped him from using the fire extinguisher on Henry. Young hit his patented spinebuster, and yelled get me a chair. Amber turned on her father, choosing Henry, and hit him with a low blow. Henry did a splash onto the chair on top of Young, then repeated from the opposite corner. Young couldn't get up, and Henry won the match. The crowd hurled insults at Amber for betraying her father. This was soap opera caliber stuff, and it furthered the ongoing story between Young, Henry, and Amber.
9) Jacob Ashworth vs. Anthony Mills
This wasn't a match, it was an unsanctioned fight. Mills choked Ashworth with a cord. they hit each other with chairs. Ashworth got the audience to throw chairs into the ring. Mills did a back body drop to Ashworth, then DDT'd him onto those chairs. "This is my fucking ring," Mills yelled "You told me I couldn't have a contract, so this is my last option." Ashworth lie there bloodied and helpless. Commissioner Only came out and stopped it. "There's a whole locker room, a whole audience that will tear you limb from limb. If you leave my building and leave him alone. I'll give you a contract." Mills complied.
10) Kevin Blue vs. Stryknyn
Stryk appeared hurt from Blue's earlier attack, but he fought valiantly through it. Blue continuously looked for ways to cheat. Stryk hit a spear, and it appeared he had the match won, but the referee said it was just a two count, so it continued. Blue went for an aerial move, but Stryk caught him in the spear winning the match, and he was crowned the first ever Why we Wrestle champion. He celebrated, and he blew a snot rocket onto Kevin Blue.
Overall this show was a triumph. 10 matches, four hours, an ultraviolent match, and a new champion made this show a complete success for Why We Wrestle, and I hope it is a sign of things to come.
Why we Wrestle returns to Cornelia at the famed Church of Southern Wrestling on April 9th.
1)Kevin Blue vs. Billy Buck
Billy Buck is truly Cornelia's hero. The entire crowd was crazy for him except a couple of fans in the front who decided to cheer for heel Kevin Blue. Blue attempted to attack Buck during his entrance, but Buck thwarted him and continued basking in the attention of his adoring admirers. Blue was going to clock Buck with the belt, but Buck superkicked him. Blue hit Buck with a chair outside the ring, and the referee didn't see. Blue got Buck to tap out, winning him a spot in the final of the Why We Wrestle heavyweight title tournament. Officials had to help Buck out of the ring. This opener set the tone for a strong overall show.
2)Stryknyn vs. Geter
A "Stryk's gonna kill you chant" filled the arena. The two of them brawled, Stryk struggling against Geter's size. In the end, Stryknyn beat Geter with a spear, and he advanced to the final to face Kevin Blue. Geter, infuriated with his loss, pulverized Stryknyn after the match. Mikael Judas came out to make the save, and he and Geter brawled their way back to the locker room. Blue took advantage of Stryk's confusion and beat him up on the ramp as he walked back to the locker room. Officials had to help him to the back.
3)Timmy Lou Retton vs. Slim J.
Timmy Lou Retton did a cartwheel and a split during his entrance. Slim J mocked Retton with Karate Kid poses, and they did a tumble-off before locking up in earnest. Timmy Lou Retton won the match with a neckbreaker, but after witnessing the athleticism and charisma of Slim J, I wonder why he's not on television.
4) The Get-Along Gang (CB Suave, P Dogg, Marko Polo, Gil Quest) vs. The Ambassadors (Jacoby Boykins and Chris Mayne) and The Sound and The Fury (William Huckaby and Joe Black)
P-Dogg and his entourage are hilarious with their wanna-be rap posse gimmick. The two teams battled back and forth. Boykins struck Huckaby out of the way when he came to his aid, and Gil Quest took advantage of the dissension and rolled up Boykins. The Ambassadors and The Sound and The Fury wanted to kill each other. Commissioner Dany Only said they had to end it if they wanted to be in the tag team tournament. They could fulfill their dreams of Tag Team Gold in the future, or they could end that all by fighting tonight. They reluctantly stopped fighting to keep their spots in the tag team tournament.
5) "Off Kilter" Rob Killjoy vs. James Drake
Drake is a relative newcomer to Why We Wrestle. Killjoy has a better look and a better moveset, but Drake had the hearts of the crowd. Killjoy tried to introduce a chair into the match, but Billy Buck came out and grabbed the chair. Drake regained momentum in the match after the distraction and won the match with a cutter.
6) Iceberg vs. Shane Hexon
Iceberg chants permeated the crowd. The match went along well until a miscue where it appeared Iceberg was supposed to roll out of the way of Hexon's move, but didn't. It messed up the rythym of the match. Hexon won the match with a kick. Iceberg raised Hexon's hand in solidarity. Dany Only hugged Iceberg in the middle of the ring, and he called for a standing ovation.
7) "Deathwish" Brad Cash vs. Masada
Special ring announcer "White Trash" announced this ultraviolent match. Light tubes, a staple gun, barbed wire boards, kendo sticks and bamboo skewers were among the featured weapons in this bloody, over the top, extravaganza. Cash wasted no time as he applied a small handsaw to Masada's head. Masada stapled Cash's forehead. Cash pulled a staple out of his head, licking the blood. The crowd called for the barbed wire boards to be introduced into the match. Masada threw Cash through the barbed wire board eliciting a "This is Awesome" chant. Cash returned the favor. The crowd yelled for fire. Cash set a kendo stick ablaze and smacked Masada in the back. Masada opened a pack of skewers, and drove them into the bloody cuts on Cash's forehead. He DDT'd him face first onto those skewers. Shards of glass flew all the way back to the bleachers when they hit each other with the light tubes. Dee Byers tried to stop the match because he said it was too violent. The crowd was livid. White Trash hit Dee Byers in the head with a stop sign, and said "We finish these matches. This is what this building has always been. Ring the Bell." The match continued, spilling outside the building for a bit, then returning to ringside. Masada set the barbed wire board outside like a table, placed Cash onto it, and dived on him. Masada got the pin after suplexing Cash into the board in the corner of the ring. Barbed wire was all in Cash's back. Fans of ultraviolence got their money's worth from this contest.
JT Talent hosted his popular Talent Show segment. He joked about having the honor of following the deathmatch. He hosted Jeff. G. Bailey, who is now over as a face in Why We Wrestle. Talent asked him "Who is your favorite client?" He named off AJ Styles, Abyss, and R Truth as a few, but added there'd been so many. He was asked about his favorite tag teams, and of course included Talent and Money. Bailey announced that he was bringing in Gunner Miller, all star in both baseball and football at the University of Chattanooga. He's already auditioned for WWE in Florida, but he's been brought here by Bailey to get "seasoning". "He's got superstar written all over him. He's going to take on your favorites, and bring nothing but pain to them. This is Gunner Miller's ring." Bailey crowed, giving us the hardcore sell at Hardcore Hell. "The church of Southern Wrestling is the only place where real wrestling takes place. Accept no substitutes."
8) Anthony Henry vs. David Young
David Young wanted to beat Anthony Henry's ass for disrespecting his daughter, Amber. It was a last man standing match. Henry insulted Young by asking why he's decided to stand up for his daughter now. "Where were you when you were off being a big star in TNA? Where were you for her when you were off sleeping with ring rats?" He said to Amber, "I love you so much, that I'll let him get out of this if he comes out here. Come out here and tell her what a piece of trash you are." Henry busted Young open. Amber looked distressed at ringside. They fought into the crowd, Henry dived onto Young driving him into the chairs. The two fought back and forth. A fire extinguisher was introduced by Henry, but Amber took it from him. Young hit Henry in the confusion, and Amber stopped him from using the fire extinguisher on Henry. Young hit his patented spinebuster, and yelled get me a chair. Amber turned on her father, choosing Henry, and hit him with a low blow. Henry did a splash onto the chair on top of Young, then repeated from the opposite corner. Young couldn't get up, and Henry won the match. The crowd hurled insults at Amber for betraying her father. This was soap opera caliber stuff, and it furthered the ongoing story between Young, Henry, and Amber.
9) Jacob Ashworth vs. Anthony Mills
This wasn't a match, it was an unsanctioned fight. Mills choked Ashworth with a cord. they hit each other with chairs. Ashworth got the audience to throw chairs into the ring. Mills did a back body drop to Ashworth, then DDT'd him onto those chairs. "This is my fucking ring," Mills yelled "You told me I couldn't have a contract, so this is my last option." Ashworth lie there bloodied and helpless. Commissioner Only came out and stopped it. "There's a whole locker room, a whole audience that will tear you limb from limb. If you leave my building and leave him alone. I'll give you a contract." Mills complied.
10) Kevin Blue vs. Stryknyn
Stryk appeared hurt from Blue's earlier attack, but he fought valiantly through it. Blue continuously looked for ways to cheat. Stryk hit a spear, and it appeared he had the match won, but the referee said it was just a two count, so it continued. Blue went for an aerial move, but Stryk caught him in the spear winning the match, and he was crowned the first ever Why we Wrestle champion. He celebrated, and he blew a snot rocket onto Kevin Blue.
Overall this show was a triumph. 10 matches, four hours, an ultraviolent match, and a new champion made this show a complete success for Why We Wrestle, and I hope it is a sign of things to come.
Why we Wrestle returns to Cornelia at the famed Church of Southern Wrestling on April 9th.
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